A Good Deal
by Neo the Saiyan angel
Summary: It was Ron's turn to pay for the meal out. Kim and Drakken both thought he would cheap out and pick Bueno Nacho again. To their surprise, he didn't, an apparent attempt to make things up for not being able to afford anything else. What he didn't tell them was what the deal was that let him pay for such a nice meal...


"Nnnngh! This is _stupid_!" Drakken growled as he tried to tame his tie. "I had a perfectly good elastic bowtie. It would have worked just fine!" He turned to his partner and griped, "Why did you have to go and toss it in the trash?"

"Because you asked me to go through your wardrobe to get rid of all the clothes that screamed 'I am a vicious supervillain'?" Kim answered as she pulled the pantyhose up her legs. To her chagrin, the only kind she had at their shared apartment was the full set that went on both legs up to the hips. It was yet another thing she marked on her list of things that she would have to get her hands on for fancier fares.

Even though she and Drakken had been involved for nearly a year, they hadn't really gotten to go on any fancier date nights than the occasional shared meal from Cow 'n' Chow. Their schedules just didn't allow it, especially as they tried to fit in time to spend with their respective best friends.

Though that would be changing very, very soon. The fact that she had pulled out her little black dress from storage spoke to that end. She didn't even feel guilty for not attending the yearly Father's Day celebration with the rest of the Possible clan.

"How in the world does a red elastic bowtie scream supervillain?" he asked incredulously, breaking into her thoughts. He dropped the tangled ends of cloth that were hanging around his neck with no small amount of frustration and stared at her, waiting for an explanation.

The real reason that she had tossed the bowtie was because of the flashbacks she had to when herself and Ron worked at Bueno Nacho, watching Ron and Ned both play with the clip-on tie… It was bad enough then, there was no reason she was going to put up with it now and tempt Ron with another thing to add to his unusual appearance. It wasn't like it mattered that much, considering how few people even wore bowties anymore outside of specific, formal events.

She couldn't say that, though. Instead, she explained, "You wore that thing when you went to get info from Big Daddy Brotherson, remember?" Deciding to appeal to his ego, Kim noted somewhat falsely, "It really made you look more dangerous. That's why it had to go."

Kim couldn't help but to cringe internally at that. That sounded like something that _Shego_ would say to wrap Drakken around her finger! Nevertheless, it served its purpose as Drakken instantly brightened and happily mumbled something about not thinking people noticed.

A gentle considering smile worked its way onto the redhead's face as she looked at his beaming visage. It was strange, how a strange little compliment could completely turn his attitude around. Part of it was his mental illness; even medicated it still reared its head. But most of it was just because Drakken was being Drakken. It was part of why she had fallen for him, though she was a little embarrassed by it.

She was again roused from her reverie by the increasingly frustrated growls coming from her beau. His hands again fumbled with the ends, somehow managing to tie it into a complicated sailor's knot instead of the simple one he was trying to make.

"Here." Kim walked over and gently removed his tense hands from the tie. It was clear that he was both working himself up again and had no idea how to actually tie a tie.

"I can't believe that the buffoon told us to dress up for this," Drakken fumed, venting his frustrations as his partner worked on the bowtie. "I can't think of a _single reason_ as to why I-er, _we_ \- should listen to what he asked. I don't even know why he asked that I come along for certain this time. There's no reason for it!"

"I'm sure Ron has something in mind," Kim assured, projecting more faith in Ron's planning than she actually felt.

"Something other than Bueno Nacho? I might have a heart attack from shock!"

Kim tried and failed to hold back a laugh, turning it into a snort. Drakken looked surprised for a moment before a smug smirk came to his face. She knew why; it wasn't often that he managed to get her to laugh at one of his snarks about Ron. Then again, Drakken's remarks tended more on the hurtful side where Ron was concerned.

Apparently deciding to capitalize on things, he continued, "Is Bueno Nacho doing a candlelit dinner night? I, uh, bet that they're going to be all shiny… Light… Stuff..." Drakken trailed off, seeming to lose track of his thoughts, then growled, "You know what I meant!"

"Piling it on a liiiiiittle too much," Kim said as she looped the end through the collar.

Satisfied, she took a step back to take in his full look. The suit he wore was a basic black ensemble, with a matching jacket and pants. The button-up white shirt looked almost starched with how stiff it was on his frame, and his obvious discomfort made her think that he really did starch it. His hair was in its usual ponytail, the years having seen it grow all the way down to his mid-back. The baby blue bowtie was a bit much next to his skin color, but since she had to choose between that or the polka-dotted tie...

"Why a bowtie?" Kim finally asked out of curiosity.

"Because," he said as he slightly adjusted the angle to be a little off-kilter, "bowties are _cool_."

 **DKDKDKDKDKDK**

"Wha…" Drakken gawked at the restaurant's facade as they pulled up in Kim's car. Ron had given her the name of the restaurant he was going to treat them all to via text just a few minutes beforehand. She had realized just which restaurant it was, and decided to keep it a surprise for Drakken until they got there.

Chez Couteaux. One of _the_ fanciest - and most expensive - restaurants in the Tri-City area. Kim remembered the last time she and Ron had been here. The night they broke up. Mutually decided, but still…

It had also been the last day they had operated as a team. That was also mutually decided; Rufus had gone into retirement, and Ron needed to focus on his life outside of crime since, well, he didn't _want_ to fight crime forever, much to Kim's shock at the time. Kim had joined Global Justice with the full intention of working up to becoming the director. It was almost a physical blow, to realize that they both had radically different ideas of the future and neither had known until that day.

That didn't matter much anymore, though. They were both happy being best friends. They were happy with their significant others, though Kim had no idea what Ron saw in Shego. She wasn't even sure how they met outside of their former bouts. At least she and Drakken got together as fellow agents of GJ after he'd signed on as a research scientist and occasional field agent.

"Kimberly…?" Drakken's voice cut into her thoughts, and again Kim realized that she had gotten lost strolling down memory lane.

"Just thinking." Kim sighed as she unbuckled, giving her head an almost imperceptible shake. "I'm feeling a little nostalgic today."

"Obviously," Drakken noted drolly as he opened the door. Pausing a moment in thought, he reached over and pecked her on the cheek before climbing out of the car.

Kim had to give herself a few moments afterwards to fight the light blush that sprinkled her cheeks.

She got out of the car and followed him to the entrance of the restaurant where a certain blond was waiting for them, seeming to fidget in impatience. It was made obvious that he was playing the mobile version of Zombie Mayhem on his phone as they got closer. Kim barely resisted rolling her eyes as she realized it, the temptation made all the more powerful by his leaning against a sign that proclaimed a free entree and drink for fathers. He seemed to notice them out of the corner of his eye as he suddenly put away the phone and looked up at them, eyes sparkling as usual.

Ron didn't look much different than he did in high school. He was wearing the same outfit he wore on their dates in high school, the white coat and black slacks, but for some reason he was wearing a loose tie as well. The only real addition from high school was a goatee that he _insisted_ was a Van Dyke goatee specifically.

"Heya guys! How are things hangin' in the crimefighting world?" Ron asked with a good amount of cheer.

"You really should shave that caterpillar off," Drakken blurted instead of answering the question, his eyes locked on Ron's upper lip. "It looks like it's trying to eat your face even more than the last time I saw you."

"But if I did that then it'd just be a regular old goatee!" Ron said as he stroked his voluminous moustache. "And I'm certain that this style will come back into it. Style, I mean. I'll be way ahead of the curve. Who'll be laughing then?"

As Ron had an exaggerated laugh, Drakken muttered a little too loudly, "Everyone that sees that terrible facial hair."

"Anyway," Kim cut into their small tiff, realizing that if she didn't cut them off now they wouldn't get seated for another hour, "you made reservations, Ron?"

"Definamundo, KP! I've got everything covered," he replied, immediately forgetting his small argument with Drakken. He promptly skipped over to the maître d, declaring, "Let's get this show on the road!"

Once Ron was firmly entrenched in an apparent comedy routine with the host, Kim whispered, "Behave. Ron is clearly trying to do better. I learned the hard way to not try to change him by force. If he wants a really lame hairstyle, he should have the freedom to have it."

"Hmph." Drakken turned his head in defiance. "Maybe if he wasn't inflicting that on the public I would change my tune. That kind of eyesore-"

He cut off as Kim began to twirl his out-of-style ponytail in her fingers.

"You were saying?" Kim prodded, a smirk on her face. Occasionally it made some sense to channel Shego, especially when Drakken began a hypocritical rant. It certainly served its purpose at the moment. Drakken seemed to bite his tongue before harrumphing and crossing his arms petulantly.

"You're still a bratty cheerleader," he said with no fire in his voice.

"And you're still a grumpy mad scientist," she retorted, elbowing him in the side good-naturedly.

"Yes I am, but at least I got the girl," Drakken murmured, ducking his head slightly to meet her gaze face-to-face. The sudden shift in mood took her by surprise in a good way, and she was tempted to give him a full kiss. Before she could, a hand suddenly broke between them, breaking the gaze.

"Okay guys, let's go and stop being weirdly close and stuff," Ron said enthusiastically, though for some reason he had a nervous, sweetly false smile on his face. He began marching into the restaurant, proclaiming "It's time to get some snackage!"

Drakken and Kim exchanged glances, confused by his sudden oddness at their closeness. Her partner just shrugged and followed Ron into the restaurant, Kim tagging along a moment later.

Once the host led them to their table, giving an occasional odd look at Drakken and Kim, he whispered something to Ron who flushed slightly and muttered, "They're really close." While apparently unconvinced at what Ron had answered, he still left the three to ponder their menus. To Kim's relief, they were adult menus.

After a moment, Drakken said, "I'll admit right now, buffoon, that I was expecting this to be some kind of Bueno Nacho event or something." He looked around, pulling at his stiff undershirt, before continuing begrudgingly, "This is an actual nice restaurant." Quickly switching gears, he noted, "Though just because you brought us here doesn't mean that I'll forget all of the _other_ visits to that Mexican monstrosity of a restaurant! At least when we go to Down Under Meat Restaurants we're having a good meal."

"Don't insult Bueno Nacho! It's the best food place to eat _ever_ ," Ron insisted. Appealing to Kim, he said, "Isn't that right, KP?"

Both of them looked at her intently, waiting for an answer. Somehow, she had ended up being the tiebreaker in their group. For two guys who have similar interests and personalities, they sure did disagree a lot.

"Bueno Nacho and Down Under Meat Restaurants are both good places to eat," she replied impartially. While it was clear that it wasn't the answer either of them wanted, they both settled down and began to peruse the menu.

Normally, Kim would have trouble even stretching the truth. The problem that had reared its head with the Centurion Project still hadn't quite gone away. Her ability to lie was _terrible_. But with these two, she had developed an ability to omit facts. They weren't outright lies which was part of how she could stand to give them to these two. The two restaurants were good places to eat… If you had no other choice and were desperate.

"Are you ready to give me your orders? Or would you like some recommendations?" the waiter asked a minute later. Nudging Drakken's side, he noted, "We are having a special Father's Day steak. Some of the best New York strip in the area."

Ron sputtered, "Uh, ah, nope! No thanks. We're, ah, all just trying to have a normal dinner." He picked up his menu and seemed to randomly point to something. "I want this 'auw grate-in sirloin' thing." Pausing, he queried, "That's steak, right?"

After the waiter confirmed the contents of the dish, he quickly got the meal orders from Kim and Drakken. Strangely, he looked between the three of them for a few moments before heading to the input station, muttering something about adoptions. He swung by the table again to drop off waters (to Drakken's great sadness, they had no cocoa moo or regular milk) before disappearing to other parts of the restaurant.

"So tell me, _Stoppable_ ," Drakken asked a couple of minutes later with a hefty dose of skepticism, "How do you expect to afford this meal, considering your usual appeal to bad finances and terrible planning?"

"So says you!" Ron protested, pointing an accusing finger at the blue man. "I wouldn't even be a poor college student if a certain _someone_ hadn't stolen my naco royalties fortune and used it to build stuff that he just ended up blowing up because of his bad plan."

A snort met his complaint, well-practiced from the same argument taking place before. "I wouldn't have been able to steal all of it if you hadn't been throwing it around like it was confetti at a party."

"I wasn't-Ouch!" He began to rub his arm where Kim had just poked him.

Drakken was doing a similar thing, giving Kim a look as he did so. Kim gave him a look right back then looked meaningfully at Ron before looking right back at her boyfriend. After a few moments, a light seemed to turn on in Drakken's head, as she had hoped it would.

Drakken cleared his throat and begrudgingly said, "I guess I can't _really_ complain. If you have the money to do this instead of buying something other than ramen to eat, then…" He practically choked on his next words. "Thank you, buffoon."

Ron looked like someone had punched him in the face with how shocked he was before he brightened up considerably and jovially proclaimed, "No problem-o, Doc! No worries, either. I've totally got this covered."

At that moment, their food arrived. Kim dug into her pecan-walnut-cranberry salad, relishing the fresh berries that went into it. It was also colorful enough to keep her attention away from her tablemates' dishes. Monstrous plates of meat and starch that would have made her sick. It was a wonder a restaurant as posh as this fixed that sort of meal.

Once they were mostly through their meal, Kim was reminded of the end-of-meal duty of paying up. She did briefly wonder how he was going to cover three expensive meals. It was part of why she decided to start ribbing him about it.

"How _are_ you able to afford this? Did you get a raise at Smarty Mart? Or is the Coupon King going to rear his head again?" Kim asked, leaning over and nudging Ron in the side with her elbow.

The blond answered, exasperated, "He totally will not! The Ronman is a different guy from senior year Ron. There will be no coupon use or kid menus for this meal." Nervously, he added, "I, ah, found a really good deal for this place. One entree and drink free."

"I wish you had said that before! Otherwise I would have at least ordered some kind of drink instead of water," Drakken protested, waving at his water. "Maybe I would have tried out raspberry tea or something. Shego's always going on about how great that stuff is."

Kim, on the other hand, was eyeing Ron suspiciously. "What kind of deal were they offering, Ron?" He twisted his gaze away and began to whistle innocently. Again, she asked, "Ron? What was the deal… You..." Her words trailed off as the horror of the truth washed over her. Mouth agape, she said, "Ron! Did you reserve this as a Father's Day dinner?"

Ron shrank away from his redheaded friend, a blush and a nervous chuckle escaping him.

"Eh?" Drakken looked between the two, clearly confused. "What about Father's Day? Did one of you forget to call your dad or something?" He muttered grumpily, "Not that James deserves to get one…"

"I can't believe you, Ron!" Kim almost hissed. "Signing us up as a family! Do you have _any idea_ how that makes us feel?"

"Wait." The older man's eyes narrowed at the blond. "You marked us down as a father and his kids? What kind of sense does that make? I don't even look like either of you!"

"Well, hehe, it was just so we could get the free food…" Ron explained with embarrassment. "I wanted to do something cool, and this seemed like a good deal to take advantage of…"

"There are some things that you just don't do," Kim continued angrily. "This is one of those-"

"Uhm, excuse me."

The three of them looked up from their argument into the nervous face of one of the waitstaff.

"Yes?" Drakken said snippily. "What do you want?"

"Well… We wanted to give you a special Father's Day gift," the young well-dressed man said hesitantly. "Would that be alright with you…?"

Ron looked relieved to have a distraction, and Kim wasn't sure how to respond. She ended up giving Drakken a questioning look, letting him know it was his decision to make.

After a few moments of annoyed contemplation, he muttered, "Fine, whatever. Just make it quick!"

"Certainly, sir!" The waiter produced a whistle and blew it, drawing the attention of everyone in the restaurant. It also served as a signal as people began to converge on the table.

The area around Drakken was crowded by extremely enthusiastic waitstaff, their presence so sudden that Kim briefly wondered if some of them were capable of teleporting. To the entire table's baffled surprise, Drakken was now in the middle of a group of happy, laughing people. The tight group was clearly bothering him; he shifted around in his seat, his arms practically stuck to his sides because of the intense crowding.

The crowd parted only slightly to allow a large dish to be set in front of the scientist. A large slice of cake that was drowning in ice cream sat stylishly on the plate, a garnish of cherries and fudge making the plate look like an art piece more than anything.

Drakken tried to protest as Kim was about to say something, but they were both cut off as the crown began to sing.

Kim's anger evaporated as she took in the sight in front of her. Surrounded by restaurant staff who were singing a Father's Day version of Happy Birthday with a gigantic ice cream laden dessert in front of him, the deadpan frown that sat on her boyfriend's face was too much for her to handle. She began to laugh as quietly as she could manage, eventually being forced to grab her stomach to try and lessen the pain in her side.

"Now say 'Cheese'!" said who was likely the manager. Panic instantly leapt to Drakken's face, but before he could try to snatch for the camera the picture was taken. Passing them an old-school polaroid from an ancient camera, the woman cheerily said, "It's not often that we get a single father and his adopted children treating him to a meal here! We like to try and reward people who choose to take the hard path in life to the betterment of others." As the staff dispersed throughout the restaurant, she patted Drakken on the shoulder. "Congratulations on the beautiful children!"

Drakken was clearly gritting his teeth, holding in an angry outburst as she walked away. He glared at the blond who was sitting there, nonplussed at what had just happened.

"Well?" Drakken spat, incensed. "Was that worth the free entree and drink?"

Ron's brain took a few seconds to switch into gear. When it finally did, he managed to blurt, "I had no idea they were gonna do that!"

"A likely story," the blue man grumbled. He looked down, then did a double-take as if he hadn't noticed the dessert before, something that wouldn't have surprised Kim. Looking up at her, he said, "Did you order this for me?"

Kim chuckled then clutched her side, having mostly recovered from her laughing session. "I think it's complimentary, what with you being an inspiration as a father single-handedly raising his two adopted children."

"Complimentary, eh?" Drakken giggled like a child and dipped a finger into the cold dessert, picking up a large wad of the cake and some ice cream on it. It was quickly shoved into his mouth. The hum of appreciation made it obvious as to how good it was.

"Hey, uh…" Ron scooted closer to Drakken, his eyes on the dessert and a spoon in hand. "Since me bringing us here ended up with you getting that dessert thing, that means you're gonna share it, right?" His spoon made to grab a scoop, but it was swatted away by Drakken's own spoon.

"Get your own, buffoon. It's not like you're a father or anything," Drakken grumbled, turning his spoon around to continue digging into his treat.

"Neither are you!"

"That certainly isn't what the reservation says, now is it?" the blue man noted smugly before shoveling another bite into his mouth.

"He has a point," Kim agreed. She pulled the wisp of hair that forever fell onto her face back behind her ear and said a touch awkwardly, "Though it makes me feel a little… _Weird_ … My boyfriend being old enough to be my _dad_..."

"Not just that! He totally went to school with him!" Ron added, unintentionally upping Kim's weirdness factor.

"Not helping, Ron," Kim sighed, feeling discomfited at the fact again rearing its ugly head.

"Nonono, KP, you're looking at this all wrong!" Ron noisily dragged his chair over to rest near Kim's as he flopped down and dragged her into a one-armed hug. "Your man has got _experience_. He's seen the world, tried the forbidden fruits, and totally snatched up real estate in weird places. He's got that maturity that you like in a guy."

At that Drakken looked up from his dessert, mouth covered in fudge and an incredulous look gracing his face. Kim felt a tingle of amusement at the coincidence, but kept her focus on what Ron was trying to say.

"A kind of boyish maturity," Ron corrected after the look. "The kind I have in spades, but more old personish!" At that both Kim and Drakken glared at him. Waving his hands around, the blond said, "Completely not what I meant! I mean… Uh…" He struggled to find the right words for a few moments before carefully saying, "A house."

"A house…?" Drakken's focus was now entirely on the former sidekick, his dessert easily forgotten. Kim didn't fault him for it; she was also paying far more attention to Ron than the remains of her meal.

"Yeah! A house." He gesticulated rather flamboyantly, drawing the attention of other tables.

Drakken facepalmed, getting fudge on his hands, before he grumpily snarled at the gawkers, "This isn't a show! Get back to your unimportant lives and leave us to, well, _us_." Most of them glowered at him, but obeyed his request.

"A house," Ron repeated with less zeal. "KP has always wanted a fixer-upper, something that she can work on and enjoy the things that she manages to improve on. She kinda got that with Mankey. He was an artsy deco-whatever house that needed some new curtains or something. But he was too nice in the first place, not really something she could get her hands dirty on.

"Me, I was a modern fixer-upper type. Had all of the utilities and stuff, just needed some hooking up and surface fixing. But once all that was done, and we really got to living our lives, things just… Didn't work out so well. I had the initial challenge, needed some work, but when I was finished getting fixed up it was kind of like she realized she hated the modern structure and the neighborhood changed. I mean, yeah, I like being a functioning member of society. It does stink that I lost KP because of it, but-"

"Hey!" Drakken butted in. "That's insinuating that I'm _not_ a functioning member of society."

"Dude, you can't even go and buy milk without going into a rant," Ron countered deadpan. As Drakken sputtered from the comeback, the blond continued, "But Kim really needs something, some _one_ she can work on constantly. She's more into the Victorian houses instead of the fancy ones nowadays with dishwashers and stuff. And maybe she'll put in a dishwasher. I dunno, I don't think Kim really _needs_ a dishwasher…"

"You're losing the metaphor," Kim pointed out, though she was pretty sure where he was going with this.

"Oh! Right. Uh, basically KP wants something with an old-school structure that she can fix up with better appliances and paint and stuff."

"How in the world does that translate into me being some kind of fixer-upper that she wants?" Drakken groused, fudge now stuck to his forehead and widow's peak.

"It's getting you to do stuff that's nicer and makes you a better person. Like, in a totally hypothetical situation, actually getting her boyfriend to apologize and give thanks when normally he just keeps growling and complaining." Ron stared hard at Drakken, trying to drive the point home.

"Nnnngh… Fine buffoon, you've made your point." The mad scientist flopped back into his chair, pouting. "Kimberly had managed to replace my ratty curtains with floofy pink ones. So what?"

As Ron began to try and drive home the metaphor enough to make a dead horse come back to life, Kim thought about it for a moment and had to admit to herself that the metaphor wasn't quite right. Ron definitely tried too hard with this one. She appreciated the point that he was trying to make and she felt better about her and Drakken's relationship, though, and that was all that really mattered.

"What Ron _means_ ," she said loudly, butting into their argument, "is that I like you in spite of your faults. Or, rather, _because_ of your faults. You're someone that I can help continually get through the worst of them while appreciating the ones that make you _you_. And no one is like you, like a custom-built house from forever ago versus the carbon copy ones that we have now. Isn't that right, Ron?"

She knew that wasn't quite what he meant.

Ron grabbed for the easy way out anyway. "Yeah! That's totally what I meant! She got it."

Drakken blinked for a few moments before sitting up straighter and smiling. "Well, I'm glad that I'm the kind of special that Kimberly needs. It makes me feel a little better at dating someone that could have been my daughter, knowing that she likes me for me no matter the age..."

Kim's brain stopped a little at that. He felt weird because she was _too young_? She'd never thought of it that way before. Never thought of it outside of how it affected her. Suddenly she was extra glad for Ron's fumbling with words. Now that she thought about it, it really must seem weird to Drakken, dating someone that he had not only tried to defeat regularly but who was also young enough to be his daughter.

That made things extra-weird on his end, considering how he and Shego had seemed to agree they were more father-daughter or uncle-niece than anything. Kim wasn't sure she could handle that kind of weirdness herself. It spoke a bit to Drakken's ability to deal, and her respect for him rose a little more.

Maybe it was a good thing Ron liked the taste of his foot so much. Kim was almost prepared to chalk up her realization of the nature of her relationship with Drakken as a result of Ron's dumb skill.

"So, ah…" Ron noisily scooted his chair back over to Drakken, again taking up a spoon. "Now can I have some of that dessert?"

The blue man looked at Kim for a moment before turning back to the younger man with a slightly vicious smirk. "Fat chance."

* * *

 **Author's Notes**

 _Beta'd by kgs-wy, SirSebastian, and somecallme._

 _It just kinda struck me as a funny idea. The words came really easy for this one. Hope you enjoy!_


End file.
